We're totally not prepared for the zombie apocalypse.

Nobody actually needs more cowbell.

Revenge is a dish best served with a light zinfandel.

Mother's Day is for actual mothers, not "bad muthas." Every day is Mutha's Day.

One may be the loneliest number, but at least it stays positive.

It's been so long since I've played Gauntlet that Wizard has probably starved to death.

Good intentions are worth their weight in gold.

If I had a light green shirt and a pith helmet I could get away with anything.

Lizards aren't pets, they're furniture.

For the life of me, I can't tell the difference between a koan and dementia.